International Women’s Day: what does IWD mean to you?
And why so much controversy?
To one of my clients from the tech industry, international women’s day was about women embracing their power: through influence and impact.
For some of you, this may be a controversial view and it’s fair to say, International Women’s Day has been gaining critics in recent years. It’s not uncommon to hear: “enough with the cup cakes!”; “It’s time for real action”; “It’s not a burden for women to bear”; “We need to fix the systems which hold the status quo in place”.
And none of those viewpoints I would disagree with!
However, I would also say this is a journey of many steps, and what is right for one organisation today, may not necessarily be appropriate for another.
No this isn’t a Consultant hedging her bets, it’s my genuine viewpoint, formed over nearly 2 decades working in and around diversity, equity, inclusion and belonging.
I’ve personally witnessed the validation and the relief women experience when they understand the mechanics of the stereotypes, systems and sponsors, which combine to hold women back in some predictable and material ways.
In the D ‘n I business - we call them “headwinds.”*
The word viscerally describes the energy it takes to overcome these barriers, many of which are not in the control of the individuals who experience them.
Let’s unpack these so-called “headwinds”
3 of the most common are, Stereotypes, Systems and Sponsors.
With regard to Stereotypes; women have multiple tight ropes to navigate.
The likeability / credibility tight rope*;
the warmth / confidence tight rope*, and
the competence / confidence tight rope* - to name just a few.
Whilst men can also experience these same tight ropes, they benefit from a greater degree of latitude or forgiveness, from the perceived socially ‘acceptable mean’.
Women are expected to be both human and high performing, collaborative and clear, focused and friendly.
It’s not difficult to see why it’s called a tight rope.
In fact, it’s a precarious balancing act with little margin for error, with the margin determined largely by men, who view women’s behaviour through their own ‘masculine lenses’.
It’s also recognised, women receive significantly more feedback on their ‘style’, than they do on their ‘substance’.
It all combines to create a ‘feedback landscape’ which can be confusing and contradictory. In sufficient doses, women doubt their competence, which understandably reduces their confidence, and can leave them uncertain of who they are and how they should show up.
Unsurprisingly, it’s not uncommon for women’s responses to resemble the pendulum on a clock. They lurch from one style to another, over-correcting at each turn and having to overcome their own self doubts along the way.
Even more concerningly, we know this ‘identity crisis’ - of what is considered acceptable professional behaviour, is magnified for culturally and racially marginalised (CARM) women. They find themselves not only navigating the same tight rope, but also attempting to behave “like white women do”*.
It’s no wonder, women’s wellbeing is typically lower than mens’.*
With regard to Systems; the solid status quo of policies, procedures and practices, which can be hard for women to adopt in the same way as men, is well documented.
The conflict Indra Nooyi refers to as, the “conflict of the corporate clock and the child bearing and rearing clock”, is just one element. There are also challenges associated with how roles are designed; how they’re priced (the gender pay gap of base pay remains stubbornly around 13% - 15%*, the total remuneration gap around 20% and the Super Gap at 26%*); the criteria associated with performance and promotion, the natural human condition to gravitate to those more like you, workplace flexibility / rigidity, and many more aspects of the historical employee experience in organisations.
With regard to Sponsors; you may have heard women are commonly over-mentored and under-sponsored*. Mentoring has value in supporting women to navigate their careers, skills and industry over the longer term. However, it’s Sponsors who create opportunities for women to shine in their organisation, navigate networks, gain insider information and prepare for promotion.
Without someone being able to advocate or champion for you behind closed doors, or in those important discussions and decisions more junior women may not be invited to, your chances of promotion, are significantly diminished. As most organisations today have more men at the top than they do women, men play a vital role in sponsoring women for leadership positions.
By this stage, you’re likely wondering how women have any ability to Embrace their Power and increase their influence and impact!
Skills for Navigating the Tight Rope
“I rebel against the notion that I’m not aggressive enough or assertive enough, or maybe somehow, because I’m empathetic, it means I’m weak. I refuse to believe that you cannot be both compassionate and strong.”
Jacinda Ardern
Interestingly, there is less data on the micro-behaviours which make the biggest difference to woman’s success, than you might expect. However, drawing from the experiences of women on boards, we can offer some valuable thought starters*.
6 behaviours, when intentionally deployed, assist women in navigating the likeability / credibility tight rope.
Asking and Inquiring, with genuine curiosity and humility can be helpful in enabling others to see alternative points of view, in a safe and supportive way.
Connecting and Networking, gives you greater social capital and support to draw on, when you want to be heard in a meeting.
Explaining Why and Providing Information based on experience or data for example, also significantly increase credibility.
Waiting for the right moment, potentially building on someone else’s view, can be less risky and increase your likeability.
Checking in 1:1 outside of the formal meeting or discussion, can give you an opportunity to clarify and better understand someone else’s views.
Finally, we recommend playing to your “strengths”.
There’s a wide body of evidence in support of the positive impact intentionally leveraging your “super-powers”* has on personal and professional performance and productivity.
What other options are available for Women to Embrace their Power and increase their influence and impact?
The value of Communication for Connection, and flexing to more effectively resonate and reach with those you seek to influence, is not to be under-estimated. It is, however, important to remain authentic and true to your own style. Additionally, identifying areas of particular value for some common communication profiles, can grease the wheels of connection and reduce points of friction. Over time, you can build the trust and confidence of ‘significant others’ in your organisation and industry.
The complex topic of Social Capital* and the value it offers for increasing credibility in meetings, is another powerful tool. Social Capital offers a host of benefits for both individuals and teams. Strong and equal team connections increase trust and performance, innovation and efficiency*. Whilst individuals with strong social capital within and between teams, increase their own performance and productivity, pay and career mobility*.
The relative value of your 3 most common networks; the operational; personal and strategic*, also offers opportunities to increase influence and impact. Whilst all 3 networks have a role to play, the personal network is typically less valuable for women, unless they happen to have friends in ‘high places’. Today, it’s still much more common for men than it is for women, to gain professional value from a personal network.
It’s the Strategic Network, and the role of Sponsors and Advocates, which offer the greatest ability to increase your professional influence and impact. As the Sponsor is expending their own “reputational capital”, these relationships are resistant to social engineering* and more likely to be founded on a more gradual organic process which often begins with mentoring.*
As men don’t have first hand experience of how to navigate the likeability / credibility tight rope as a woman, they often benefit from support in becoming an effective Sponsor for women. Indeed, there’s a cascading set of skills, which become increasingly valuable as the relationship matures.*
Embracing your Power for influence and impact
Whilst we should not leave the burden of enabling gender equity to those with the least influence, it’s clear there are some effective mechanisms individuals can learn and leverage, to intentionally increase their influence and impact.
By no means are women the whole solution to the headwinds we face in organisations, however, there is no doubt we are stronger together, and it is high time we let go of the “Queen Bee” syndrome, which has the potential to tear us apart.
“Women helping each other - coaching, mentoring, and providing tips - is a great way for us to be our own force”
Indra Nooyi
One final thought about which I’m passionate, is the role and responsibility women with greater privilege can and should play in lifting up women who face additional headwinds. It may be culturally and racially marginalised women, or it may be women from a different social class, or women with a visible or invisible disability or younger or older women. Until the day comes when we are “all genders together”, those of us with privilege play an important role in enabling others to embrace their power and increase their own influence and impact.
At I LEAD Consulting we’re on a mission to simplify Diversity and Inclusion for Leaders and Teams.
PRACTICE INCLUSION | EMBRACE DIVERSITY | ACTIVATE ALLIES
*Korn Ferry; adapted from Ibarra, Ely & Kolb; Baker & Bourke; HBR; DCA; Monash University; WGEA; AFR; McKinsey; Trzebviatowski, McCluney, Hernandez; Gartner; Ibarra; McKinsey; Pentland; Putnam; Moran; Brooks & Brooks; CCL
